I hope the title of this writing got your attention! What thoughts pop into your head when you try to guess what I’m going to talk about?
Over the past few months I have been convicted that I am being very half-hearted toward God at times. This looks like reading or hearing some scripture and just kind of letting it sit between action and inaction in my mind. Like “Let everything that has breath praise the Lord,” Ps. 150:6. “Yay” I say in a small voice and wave my imaginary pompoms indicating a nod in God’s direction and I move on. Or do I? I maybe think to myself, as if God weren’t aware of my thoughts, that I’m not feeling so thankful – like today or this week or this year. Actually God hasn’t really been doing all that I want Him to do. And so… I sulk. I want more answered prayers and less hardship. I want my efforts to get better to pay bigger dividends. I want to feel God and not just know He’s there. I might actually be luke-warm toward God.
This is so easy to slip into I’m afraid. During this season of invisible chronic illness I have been sulky-minded and I’m pretty sure it’s wrong. It might feel like an easier way of living because the effort is so little. Or I have laziness in my thought life. Or hurt in me that wants to bite back at God. But truly being lukewarm as warned about in Revelations 3:15-16 is somewhere I don’t want to be. Listen to what it says, ”I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm – neither hot nor cold – I am about to spit you out of my mouth.” Super sobering.
So how do I turn on the jets and get out of this funk of my soul? How can I be hot for God when there is so much “sulk” in my soul? I think the answer is simple…just start doing it! Hearing that Bible verse and applying it here and now with effort even when I don’t feel like it. Is that like “fake it until you make it”? Or keep doing it until it becomes real? I don’t know but it does require effort and supernatural help from the Holy Spirit. My flesh is so irritatingly loud and needs to be firmly put in it’s place…not listening to you. And my attitude needs to be forgiven…”I’m sorry Lord”. And my trust needs adjustment to walk by faith. Yeah I think I forgot that.
Whatever your circumstances, don’t let sulky-mindedness have it’s way. And it’s ok to have imaginary pom moms but then ‘use’ them for maximum effect in giving it your all. We have a relationship with the Creator that’s worth fighting for and He loves us so much. See that’s me…putting the love thing in here at the end to reverse ‘sulky’ and live it out! So I’ll say it again…God loves me! I’m going to take a moment to hear that, believe that and accept that. Amen.
